You are not alone in your struggles or feelings. I am right there with you. Motherhood is tough. Raising multiple children with varying personalities is tough. Homeschooling children who don’t want to learn or who fight you to do their work is tough. Struggling to be a good mother while not forgetting your hubby can be challenging. Having older independent children, a preschooler, and a nursling all at the same time can be exhausting.
Rest assured mom, you are not alone!
Maybe you have a child or children with medical needs. Maybe you have children with dietary concerns. Maybe you feel twisted, pulled, and stretched as thin as you can be.
Reach out to someone you trust. Reach out to a loving mommy friend of older children. Reach out to another mom that homeschool’s or whose child also has special concerns or medical needs.
Please remember that YOU cannot do it all. Full bellies are more important than clean dishes. Snuggling up with a little OR big kid is more important than vacuuming. Reading or dreaming with your child is more important than folding the laundry.
Being present is ever so important. Trust me I know and my heart twinges when my 10 yr. old says, “Mommy, I miss you.” And I realize I have not gone anywhere for weeks but have not spent time with each child either.
This is my greatest struggle-time! Finding time to do it all. You can’t! Don’t even try. I am warning you. You will be miserable. You children will be miserable. Your spouse will feel stressed and miserable. Your marriage will become strained and miserable.
How can you not get trapped into “doing it all”?
1. Delegate a chore to each capable child to ease your stress. Don’t expect perfection but honest effort.
2. Delete a time sucker! Yes, quit watching ONE television show or turn off Facebook for one hour a day. Heck, turn your phone to silent during the hours of 10 pm to 7 am like I do. Your emails, tweets, texts, and notifications can wait! I promise.
3. Say no to any new commitments. Don’t whine about not having time for children, marriage or self but sign up for something new. Really think about saying YES to a volunteer opportunity even if it’s a really worthy cause. What is more worthy than your family time?
4. Find an activity that the entire family enjoys. This will be tough but can be done. Engaging all family members will build a stronger family bond. Maybe it’s singing karaoke or making up skits or maybe building cardboard forts or new LEGO creations but whatever it is try to engage ALL family members no matter how little.
5. Schedule time for Date Nights whether out or in. So be it if you have a toddler. Get a movie for big kids and let them build a snuggle fort to watch their movie. Then spend time with your spouse. Plan a vacation or garden plans. Talk about dreams and goals for family or marriage. Explain struggles. Agree to support each other no matter what!
6. Pray for your family, your spouse and those families around you. Most are struggling just like you but you don’t know it. Most people won’t be airing their dirty laundry on Facebook but could be sitting at home in anguish.
7. Ask for others to pray with and for you, for families and for Christian marriages that are struggling. Pray for those whom you think really have it together because they may not.